I have a folder on my laptop for random memes and pictures I come across and want to save. It is simply titled "Yep." Looking through it recently, I realized one of the common themes is something like this one.
And so, at the ripe old age of fifty-five,
- I have given myself permission to be me without worrying that I am not meeting all the expectations others have of me.
- I have permitted myself to not care that others do not understand my desire to be home.
- I am allowing myself to remain true to myself while maintaining a respectful relationship with others who value different things and ways to spend their time.
- I am allowing myself freedom from being everything to everyone.
What does this mean? It means I won't attend events or gatherings just because "I should." It means I cannot worry if someone is upset with or offended by me and my decisions. I have done that, and trust me. It is exhausting. I respect others and their desire to be busy all the time. I appreciate the fact that they thrive on social engagements and family events. I expect them to do the same for me. This doesn't mean I won't ever attend; I will choose to attend when I want or can. This may sound harsh, selfish, or even rude. After all, isn't it expected and polite to participate in all the things? Maybe. However, family time used to be valued more. People didn't fill their free days with parties, picnics, get-togethers, game nights, ball games, and dance recitals. They focused on their home and immediate family, so they felt more inclined to attend when an invitation arrived.
I understand and appreciate if you disagree with me. I am simply being me and deciding to embrace the homebody that I am. I have been called weird, strange, odd, and selfish in my life, which is okay. I have simply decided to show myself grace and allow myself the space to be in my home with my books, pups, family, and peace. And it feels good.
Have a cozy summer day, my friends.
Thank you for visiting!
Billie Jo
I don't think you are strange, weird or any of that for being who you are. In fact, I envy it! I am also quite an introvert and homebody and it's definitely difficult to navigate being that way when I have two teenagers who thrive on being busy. These last few days of our heat wave have made us stay indoors and it's driving them crazy to not be active at the moment. I'm actually enjoying the peace but I do feel bad for them. I am also learning how to say no to the people outside of my own home. It's not easy. I admire you for your desire to live a peaceful life. I'm sure I'll fully get there ... one day.
ReplyDeleteI agree! One thing that really bugs me is when people always seem to brag about how busy they are! As if their self-worth is based on how busy their life is. We need to slow down, smell the roses, and notice the little things.
ReplyDeleteI couldn't agree with you more my friend. You keep doing you and know I'm over here doing the same thing the same way. xoxo
ReplyDeleteGosh I love this post so much I may have to save it for reference when I’m doubting my self. Loved every word you wrote.
ReplyDeleteIf you are strange then so am I... and I am ok with that! LOL thanks for sharing and being real!
ReplyDeleteI feel this SO much. I have lived most all of my life being obligated to do certain things and expected to be at certain places, and frankly, I am so tired. Like you, I have started protecting my peace and time. You get no judgement from me about it! I'm with you!
ReplyDeleteI will share with you how I refer to myself. "Delightfully odd". Feel free to use it. I hear a different drummer than most of my friends, fortunately they accept me as I am.
ReplyDeleteYou are so blessed to have this kind of a life, and I so agree with you. Now do you give lessons????? Asking for a friend....Love you!
ReplyDeleteHello!
ReplyDeleteI enjoy visiting your blog-so full of beauty, inspiration and faith. Thank you!
This just speaks to my weary heart today. Thank you for putting into words how I feel, and encouraging me to just lean in to how God has made me. After decades its time to let me be me without the stress and guilt of trying to fit in.
Blessings,
Terri
So well said dear Friend! 💗
ReplyDeleteBy you and also by Ms Jane Austen (love that quote and darling pic). Life is too short to get hung up on the pressures society, or others, may put on us. I think that's not weird - it's wisdom. And I think the older we get the more we get to revel in our wisdom and in knowing ourselves so well. We've earned that at least. There isn't a blanket label anyone can put upon someone else who is just being themselves. Thanks for sharing this 🙏🏻xoxo
Amen! Colette in New Brunswick, Canada
ReplyDeleteYep, I agree, smiles. Wishing you a lovely day. smiles
ReplyDeleteOh, I love all of this, Billie Jo, from the words to the delightful images you shared at the end. I am such a "home" person, so I can relate to everything you said. It has never been normal for me to be busy all the time or to constantly be going to events and gatherings. Now and then is good, and when we choose to, like you said. But all in all, family is important to me, and home is a beautiful place to be. Thank you for your special words on this Wednesday afternoon.
ReplyDelete~Sheri
You do you, Billie Jo. Everyone will adapt.
ReplyDeleteHi Billie Jo! Yes, home is the best place. Good post!
ReplyDeleteYes, indeedie!! I'm with you 100%! Hugs!!
ReplyDeleteExactly! Could not agree more.
ReplyDeleteYou are living a very intentional life -- which I love. And it's what I strive for too. We need to be discerning on who and what we give our attention to!
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing more precious than being happy and content with our lives. However we choose to live them.
ReplyDeleteI had a lovely conversation, whilst on a train journey recently, with a very pleasant young man. He was remarking, politely, about how when women (of a more mature age) will speak their mind once they have had a few drinks. I corrected him by saying that we will speak our minds regardless ;)
I love the Jane Austen quote! And I totally agree with you, Billie Jo, about being ourselves...even when it may not be what everyone else is doing. I especially took note of your thoughts on how family life used to be valued more. I see young families running themselves to death to make certain that their children do "all the things" that they feel are necessary and I just want to tell them that what their kids really need is them and their time. xx
ReplyDeleteBillie Jo, I consider myself a recluse....a hermit of sorts....so you know that *I* know what you're talking about. I "go" whenever I must but my trips are very far & few between. I prefer home. I don't "people" very well. Enjoy your space, my dear. Love, Andrea xoxo
ReplyDeleteI feel that we don't have to always please others. I believe that only God is the one that really matters. :)
ReplyDeleteI know what you are talking about about and I feel the same .
ReplyDeleteYep. I agree wholeheartedly. I wish I could get others in my life to understand how much I love home. And yes, "home" for me includes being in the camper. Because I have my own bed, bathroom and kitchen. I would be happy just staying at the campground and enjoying the smell of pine. Like last week, I didn't leave the condo from Tuesday until Friday night, except to take Zoey outside to go potty. I LOVED it.
ReplyDeleteBlessings and hugs,
Betsy
Good post....I love that someone else makes decisions similar to me.....that we do not have to attend events that we don't want to go to or do not feel obligated to go to. I have a good friend that believes it is important to go to every funeral of anyone who has lived in our small town for the past 50 years. Not me....if I am close to them or their kids, I will go. I do love our home and there are many days that I am home all day long...all week long. This makes me happy just relaxing in my comfy place.
ReplyDeleteI understand what you shared. I still stay home a few days a week and getting things done. I read the bible study and write the answers to the questions. At times I have to go into my bedroom so it will be quiet due to someone talking as she walks by me a few times. I'm at NW Christian ✝️ convention this week as I like being here as it's another time to learn more throughout scriptures and why it needs to be in our minds to continue to follow Jesus. Good to see people who I know. Enjoy your day and beyond!!
ReplyDelete~~Becky L