November 4, 2022

Friday Thoughts

~Not how I want to spend my holiday season~

 Hello, my friends. And Happy Friday! I have been thinking about my intention of simplifying our holiday celebrations this year for many reasons. First of all, my children are older now, and as much as I would like to hold on to every tradition we enjoyed for so many years, I also realize they may no longer be as relevant. In addition, I also recognize that my anxiety tends to flare up during times of stress, and as my therapist reminds me, even though I don't think of holiday preparation as stressful, good stress is still stress. And finally, I want to be sure that I leave time to practice self-care during this festive time to enjoy and appreciate the beauty of the season. 

That sounds well and good, right? But what exactly does it look like? What specific things can I do to prepare for and enjoy a simple, cozy, family holiday season? I am glad you asked!

Delete Instagram from my phone. For me, the constant scrolling is overwhelming. The barrage of images, decorations, recipes, and gift ideas fills my brain with unnecessary thoughts and expectations. I think back to my mom, and the wonderful Christmas seasons she gave us. The meals were family favorites, the decorations were ones she had for years, and the entire feel was homey. There were pop bottles on the table and wrapping paper on the floor. The tree was covered with random, mismatched decorations; we kept the same ones every year. My childhood Christmases weren't the images I repeatedly see, telling me that I need to have my house, my tree, my presents, and my table picture perfect. They were better than that. They were real. 

Plan less. Years ago, I was the expert micromanager. I suppose I had to be with four young children and all the activities that go with that. I used to make a schedule for everything we needed to do, from mailing Christmas cards to baking cookies. It worked then. Now, I realize I don't need to be so structured. It isn't easy for me, but I am working on it. I am not going to stick to a schedule of preplanned activities just because we used to do them or because everyone else is. If we want to bake some cookies, we will. Some nights we might call the kids to come over for a movie or to take a ride to look at the Christmas lights. If we do, great. If not, that's ok too. 

Gift with intention. This year Santa asked the kids for ideas of a few things they want or need and a few they didn't. That way, Santa can be ready with everything wrapped long before Christmas Eve, and I won't be tempted by all those things I see that I don't really need to buy. I find great joy in giving and putting thought into the perfect gift for each of my people, and sometimes less is more.

Focus on home and family. I always try to do this and hope to do the same this holiday season. For me, being home, sitting by the fire, and looking at the twinkling lights of the tree brings me peace. I am happiest in my cozy clothes, surrounded by my family, watching our favorite Christmas movies. The season passes so quickly; I want to enjoy every single moment. I can do that by simplifying my preparations and commitments and turning inward while leaving the chaotic world outside.

These are the things that I think will work for me. They may or may not be right for others. You do you, my friends. Do what works for you and your family. After all, family is what matters most. 


 ~This is more like it~



Have a cozy weekend, my friends. See you back here Monday!

Billie Jo

Google for the images.


23 comments:

  1. Simple holidays are the best. I love the entire Christmas Season which for me goes from the day after Thanksgiving until the day after New Years. It is my time to hibernate a bit and enjoy each and every day. I hope you have a wonderful weekend Billie Jo.

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  2. Good morning beautiful Billie Jo! You’re so wise and such a beautiful soul. I really need to make an account here but I haven’t yet. I agree about deleting instagram (and all platforms similar!) comparison is a thief of joy. I’ve read how damaging social media can be on a person. It was difficult at first but I’m so much happier being off of social media of that nature. I used to follow you and you me on IG 😊 I have four children as well, deal with crippling anxiety at times and love Halloween the most. As always, I look forward to your posts. I hope you have a cozy and relaxing weekend. Xo Brooke

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  3. Love the ideas…I am a minimalist who plans ahead…no stress…just fun..you will be glad…

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  4. We were just talking about Thanksgiving and since we spend it here in Florida, we might just make it different this year. It might be nice not to cook! lol Enjoy your day!

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  5. Sweet girl, I agree. Family is what counts . One year I decided I was spending too much time and money on Gifting. So I just started giving money. No more things that did not fit or had to be returned. Buying for the grands was hard work. Now I am at the age where the daughters do the holidays. I still bring a dish or two of things they like. We call it pitch in most times. Helps all. Always everyone is involved in clean up. Blessings and great peace to you. xoxo, Susie

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  6. Very well said. This has been a tough couple years for me and that may just be a picture of me at the top of your post. Ha! I finally took a look at what the holidays would add to my stress this year and I just decided to let the big expectations go and majorly simplify.

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  7. Amen to this! I need to ditch Instagram too. I'd love to get rid of Facebook but can't seem to do that either. Christmas has definitely changed for me now that my boys are grown on out on their own. They still come home for the holidays and it's wonderful but it's just not the same as when they were still here. And shopping for them now as adults has changed so much too. I'm always wanting to buy and give so much, but they insist they don't need or want anything. Shopping for others in general has dwindled down to almost nothing for various reasons. It's sad because we've all been raised that Christmas is to shop shop shop and give give give, but these days, for me at least, it's becoming a whole different kind of Christmas and I'm slowly learning to appreciate it in new ways.

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  8. I like what you shared and nice pictures from a Google photo search. First one made me laugh. Life gets busy from Thanksgiving thru Christmas. Working can give me stress with so many people on weekends then come home and get things done. But I do what I can. If not it will have to wait.
    I need to check out what weather has hit us as I heard thunder 🌩 3 times. I heard a few a bit ago and now it's windy. Been chilly 2 days outdoors. Thankfully we have heat. Have a good day 😊

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  9. It is hard to let go of traditions. But this year I am not decorating at all or baking as we are traveling. It is also time for the younger two kids to step up and create their own holidays. It's not that I don't want to, but I have noticed the last two times I did a huge family dinner, I was literally sick when we sat down. I had to stay in bed the day after. I just can't do it anymore.

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  10. Hi Billie Jo. Great post! Amen for simplifying the holidays! I stepped away from both Facebook and Instagram a while back and now whenever I take a minute to scroll (which isn't often), I feel that anxiety and depression return and I am so glad I decided that, for the most part, those social medias are not for me. I haven't completely deleted my accounts, but FB is NOT on my phone and I only check-in with certain people and severely limit scrolling. I have also cut back a lot of holiday shopping and decorating and I am so glad I did. Thanks for sharing the changes you are making to your holiday celebration. All are great ideas!

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  11. Hi Billie Jo~ I can't even tell you how much I needed to read this post! I struggle with anxiety especially during the holidays. I loved your ideas, in fact I jotted down more than a few of them. The last picture is what I remember when I was a girl...so much better than the first photo. Oh, by the way, I just uninstalled IG, my girls really thought I should have it...but I don't even like it, thanks for the nudge ;0) Hugs, Barb

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  12. Hi! I love the last photo so much! It reminds me of family Christmases growing up and really how we still celebrate today. Honestly, less is more to me. It's really about the people you surround yourself with and not things. We will likely put our Christmas tree up early again this year as we all enjoy the lights so much. You are right, they really do bring peace and comfort. And as far as Instagram goes... I know I spend/waste too much time on there and I really need to back off and that's exactly what I'm going to do! I deleted my Facebook account about ten years ago and haven't missed it once. Thank you, sweet friend, for this wonderful post today. I feel the same way. Have a cozy weekend!

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  13. Yes, yes, yes! It's hard to do, isn't it? When there is such a "competition" for homes, gifts, trees, families, etc. to be perfectly-perfect? If you find time, read this post titled Just Stop (http://www.farmgirlbloggers.com/11023) the author, Rebekah Teal, it is spot on with what you're saying. Thanks so much for the reminder...Mary

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  14. A simplified Christmas sounds wonderful. We enjoy a fire, lights on the tree, candles, games with the family, music and a nice meal. Simple but beautiful. We make cookies with the kids one weekend and they come for a sleepover another time. It is the time together that matters.

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  15. I agree. That is why the family is going to Egypt for two weeks, no gifts, no decorations, no stress, no Internet. Just the family and the pyramids. I get stressed just thinking about all the work that Christmas brings, gifts, cards, food, decorations, and then all the clean up. This year nothing of that. Have a wonderful fall and holidays.

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  16. Sounds perfect. Several years back I simplified Christmas (much to some other's disapproval!) in order to prioritise my own time and wellbeing, and it felt like a weight had been lifted. Xx

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  17. Such a beautiful post...Christmas will be much different this year...but nonetheless, I am happy we have a home to call home, if that makes sense. Wishing you a beautiful weekend, my friend.

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  18. I enjoyed reading your thoughts on holiday planning. I'm not quite ready to think about it all though I have been here and there (just trying to not jump ahead too much). It's hard when traditions change and they've changed so rapidly the past few years (here anyway). It almost feels like starting over as the kids are in new stages. Of course, I don't care how old they are...pajamas and books on Christmas Eve. Ha. Somehow I think you'll have a wonderful holiday season no matter what you do (or don't do).

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  19. Yes! I am here for a simplified holiday season. Like you, I’ve started filtering out social media and ads during this time because it just makes me feel so overwhelmed and like I’m not “doing it right”, if that makes sense. I, too, look back on Christmas when I was growing up with such fond memories, and it wasn’t curated to perfection in the least. It was good food, family, and friends. I miss that so much sometimes. Good for you for making the holidays your own!

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  20. It sounds like you have the holiday season planned out well to your needs! Have a great week!

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  21. What a great idea to ask the kids for ideas of what they want and what they DON'T want. You are a holiday genius!

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  22. Yes, I never understood why people get so overwhelmed and exhausted and stressed with the most simple and Holy day. When my kids were little, I did plan things, but I always tried to get everything done early, so I would have that two weeks to focus on what the holiday really meant. It's nice that you are doing just the things you want to do this season, and not anything more. I used to give lots of gifts, but now it's only a couple for each person. My family is too big for that now haha. That first image I've seen before, and it always makes me chuckle. I loved hearing about your childhood Christmas'. I can just see your mom's tree covered with all her own special ornaments that were kept and put out every year. Those are the best kind. : )

    ~Sheri

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Thanks so much for saying hello!

Billie Jo